Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
