AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
