So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
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