I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
50% drunk capacity currently
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
