She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
