He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Randomize
