he puts the penis in happiness.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
