I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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