Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
it glows. i had to have it.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
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