well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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