Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize