I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
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