I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
