Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
