i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
