Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
