Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
babies were throwing up all over the place
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
