I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Randomize
