i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
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