Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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