We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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