Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
it was like eating out sand paper
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
