she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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