U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
