i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
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