Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
