Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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