Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize
