when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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