i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
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