I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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