I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
