Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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