...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
