I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
