She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
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