dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
