Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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