Pants 0. Shit 1.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
