SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Sext me about skeletons
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
