U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Is her dick bigger than yours?
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
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