i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
