he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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