Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Randomize
