Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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