"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
