im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
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