haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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