I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
