Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
